Etiquette for Mother-of-the-Bride Dresses
The role of mother of the bride is a special one. All eyes are on her as she walks down the aisle right before the bridal party. Her entrance signals the beginning of the ceremony. You'll want to be dressed correctly if you are the bride's mother. While the rules of etiquette on wedding attire have changed greatly, some basic rules still apply.
Color
General etiquette rules state that the mother of the bride should be dressed in a color that is complimentary to the bridal party colors. It is not necessary, however, that the mother's dress be the same color as the bridesmaids. In fact, matching the bridesmaid’s dresses is frowned upon; it makes the mother appear to be a bridesmaid in disguise. Instead, pick a color that is flattering to you and does not clash with the bridesmaids. For example, if the bridesmaids are in kelly green, don't wear an olive green dress. A better choice for kelly green would be a dress with a clear tone, such as royal blue or lemon yellow.
The mother of the bride should also avoid wearing white, ivory or cream. You don't want to compete with your daughter and wearing a similar color to her makes it appear like you want to be the bride. Solid black, while very fashionable, is also discouraged. A black dress says that you are in mourning for your daughter's marriage.
Style
The time of the ceremony dictates the length and style of the mother's dress. A short, or street length, dress is appropriate for morning and afternoon ceremonies. If the ceremony is very formal a long dress may be worn in the afternoon, but looks awkward in the morning. You should also avoid too much ornamentation, such as beads or crystals, for daytime ceremonies.
For evening or night ceremonies, a long dress is appropriate. Mothers may also choose a cocktail length dress. More extravagant ornamentation is allowed, but do not surpass the bride's dress. The mother of the bride may be tempted to show off a fine figure with low- cut neckline, a strapless dress or a slit skirt. These are inappropriate on the bride's day.
Notifying the Groom's Mother
It is traditional for the bride to notify the groom's mother of her dress color and style. This allows the groom's mother to select her gown in a different color but similar style. It is important for future family relationships that neither the bride nor her mother dictates a style to the groom's mother. Informing the groom's mother should be done in a helpful and gracious manner.
Timeline
The mother of the bride should select her dress as early as possible to allow the groom's mother a chance to pick hers. Early selection also ensures that dress selection and fittings do not get lost in the last frantic weeks of wedding planning.
It's the bride's day and her mother must remember this. Selecting an appropriate dress early will make for a stunning entrance on the wedding day.